The first song that quickly caught my ear was “Happy Christmas.” I listened carefully to its lyrics after getting home, trying to understand what the song was saying about the Christmas season. The message is that Christmas should be celebrated by everyone, everywhere. Sadly, not everyone gets this opportunity, especially during times of war and political strife. Celine Dion has hope for the New Year; however, she asks that it be “a good one without any fear.”

With all the bad news in the media these days, I wonder if that message behind the song is still valid? The song made me think that despite all the disasters and turmoil that have happened in the world recently, we can still do our part to help make others’ Christmas dreams a reality. This song is a perfect opportunity to stress an important message of a fearless and happy life for everyone, which will only come about if we commit to a new year of change.

“These Are Special Times,” the title song, intrigued me. It started out in a slow beat, indicating that there was probably some sentimentality attached to it. Sure enough, as I continued to listen, I caught this sense of soft-heartedness within the song. “These are the special times, times we’ll remember, the precious times, the tender times we’ll hold in our hearts forever,” Celine Dion sang ever so slowly.

Being a holiday themed disk, Celine was singing about how people who care about each other share the holidays. I found this to be especially true, as the holiday season is a time when people, especially friends, significant others and family are together, hoping to share special memories with each other. This song is a reminder that it is the memories between those we care about that should not be forgotten. It is these special moments that we treasure, holding them in our hearts forever and constantly reminding us that there are people in our lives that do care.

The next song was another very sentimental one that caught my attention. “Another Year Has Gone By” was so gracefully sung. It is about people who care for each other and is set during the Holiday season. In particular, Celine Dion sings in reference to two people who love each other, “And we’re still holding hands when we’re walking, acting like we’ve only just met, but how could that be when there’s so much history, guess that’s how true lovers can get, another year has gone by.”

Based on the lyrics, this song gives the opportunity during the holiday season for two lovers to reflect upon the positive aspects of their relationship. It is also a reminder that even throughout the year, and even during the bad times, the one that you love will always be there for you. This love is expressed in simple ways and gestures in this song. The lyrics offer hope and inspiration for couples in love.

Another of Celine Dion’s CDs that I thoroughly enjoyed was A New Day Has Come (2002). The cover scene of Celine at the beach was very tranquil and lovely, and several songs contained within provided additional hope and inspiration for me. And what a coincidence, too, I thought, as the title of this disk had the words “new day” on it, which reminded me of the New Year that was coming up.

In the title track, Celine Dion tells the message of renewal, whereby she sings, “Let the rain come down and wash away my tears, let it fill my soul and drown my tears, let it shatter the walls for a new sun, a new day has come.” It reminded me that despite life’s challenges, there is hope for brighter days ahead. In difficult times, it is okay to cry and express emotions of sadness and grief. Yet, there is a reminder that this sadness and grief is only temporary. The more difficult the moments one faces in life, the more each moment will wash itself out, just like tears being washed away. In finding the inner strength from one’s inner self, a person can overcome these challenges.

Sometimes when we need to overcome life’s challenges, we need to find solutions to life’s problems. The song “Right In Front of You” tells of how one can find these solutions. “Right in front of you, right in front of me, we were looking, but somehow, some way, we couldn’t see, that the love was always there, it’s been around us everywhere, I had to fall to finally see, that you were right in front of me,” Celine sings, as her vocal tone beautifully increases in strength, and with a heavy but melodic beat. When we look at things for the first time, we take it for granted sometimes, Celine clearly conveys. But, when we look again, we can often find the answer or true meaning.

In the end, when one has overcome such challenges, there is usually a reward. In the song “The Greatest Reward,” Celine Dion sings about the rewards in life, beautifully conveying the message that being the reward of a person rather than an object is the most important reward of all. Reflecting, she sings of life and how when one changes their attitude and opens up to others, they are able to achieve the rewards or benefits that they deserve in their life. “Now the greatest reward is the light in your eyes and the sound of your voice and the touch of your hand you made me who I am,” sings Celine Dion sweetly and seemingly effortlessly, causing me to ponder the rewards in my life.

Overall, as an artist, Celine Dion offers new insight into the world around us, as expressed in these two musical works. Focusing on the holiday season and the New Year, we are all reminded that there are times we need to be reflective and thankful of what is around us. We also need to be renewed in order to change for the better. Even going beyond the holiday and the New Year season, these messages of hope continue throughout the rest of the year and for the rest of our lives.

I would highly recommend to everyone both of Celine Dion’s These Are Special Times and A New Day Has Come CDs. In particular, I would recommend her musical works to people who are searching for meaning in their lives, or who are experiencing difficult times in their lives, as these musical collections are a reminder that there is something in life to look forward to. After all, everyone needs a reminder of the special times and the changes that are needed for a new day in one’s life.

References

Dion, C. (1998). These Are Special Times . Sony.
Dion, C. (2002). A New Day Has Come . Sony.

I was browsing through the AUSU website and I could not help but notice a webpage about AUSU Coffee Groups. “What were these coffee groups all about?”, I wondered, and I contacted a member of the AUSU student council to obtain further information. In response, I found out that coffee groups are informal meetings where AU students can get together in-person at local coffee shops to discuss issues regarding studying at Athabasca University. To my surprise, I also found out that there was no group set up in Toronto, where I am currently residing.

Being new to Athabasca University, and given the isolating nature of distance education, I decided that coordinating a coffee group in Toronto would be the perfect opportunity for me to meet other AU students, so I volunteered to be the contact for a Toronto group. I figured that later on I could probably meet some new students who would be able to help each other by sharing their distance learning experiences.

At this point there were only about five coordinator contact names. A short time later, there it was! My name was listed as one of the two contacts in Ontario. Yikes!

October 2003

I had just finished sending out e-mail questionnaires for the AU students who were interested in participating in the Toronto Coffee Group asking questions such as, “What part of the city are you located in.” I was surprised that so many people decided to reply. I never knew there were so many students studying at AU out here in Toronto!

November 29, 2003 (Meeting #1)

There I was, on a cold rainy Saturday in Toronto, sitting alone at a table in a local coffee shop waiting patiently for four complete strangers to arrive. “What have I gotten myself into?”, I wondered, and before I knew it, three complete strangers sat in front of me. Shivering from the cold outside, we introduced ourselves as we ordered coffee.

Anxiously taking another sip from my cup, I nodded and listening to the students speak. The fist questions were things like: “What program are you in?”, and “Why did you choose Athabasca University?” Interestingly, we found out we are all from different programs (from arts to business to education programs, at both undergraduate and graduate levels), were at different places in our programs (from a first year student like me, to a student who only had one more year to finishing their program), and were studying at Athabasca University for different reasons (from increasing job qualifications, to learning part-time to have more time with family, to learning for interest). Yet, despite our differences, we all had one goal in common: we were all determined to complete our educational pursuits through Athabasca University.

“Did I tell you about the tutor who…?”, continued a student, relating her positive and negative experiences with past tutors. “I guess it all depends on which tutor you are compatible with and your learning style,” I thought, finding some of her experiences to be quite funny. Other topics discussed that day included the dependency on frequent e-mail and phone communication, concerns with text and library loan materials, variations within examination locations and examination fees, previous post-secondary learning experiences, transfer credits and prior learning assessments, study hints/tips and study schedules, etc.

Finding that we all had common issues, I slowly began to feel more comfortable around the group. “Maybe being a part of the coffee group is not so bad after all,” I thought. Likewise, everyone else was feeling comfortable talking to each other, too, wondering where we would have been if it were not for the coordination of AUSU and its website. Talking about the different aspects of the AU and AUSU websites, we learned that there are many sections offering services you might not expect from a distance learning university. For example, we found sections for: purchasing of study-related merchandise, for courses and program descriptions, sections where students could voice concerns about their courses and tutors, and sections where students could update their registration information. “Wow, I didn’t know that,” said one student, in awe upon hearing what the university had to offer.

Just for fun, we also spoke about other issues that were not related to academics. I let out a small chuckle, as we began to talk about garbage disposal and composting in the city. “You never know what you can find in the garbage these days,” commented one of the students. As well, we talked about the city life of Toronto, riding the Toronto transit system (TTC), holiday shopping (since the holidays were around the corner), balancing work and family, possible coffee group field trips within Toronto and future meetings within our coffee group.

Before we knew it, time had passed and it had been two hours. As everyone was getting ready to leave, we all hoped to meet again soon. “Thank you for the Mocha Thingies,” one of the students said as she was leaving to pay her bill. It was a “mocha-riffic” day, indeed!”, I thought as I paid my bill, preparing to leave the warming atmosphere of the café to reenter the cold Toronto winter night.

January 24, 2004 (Meeting #2)

So far, so good. The first meeting was a success. With the holiday season now over, I thought that it was time for another meeting and set one up. On Saturday afternoon, out of breath from running down the street, I entered the same coffee shop and looked around for the students who were at the last meeting.
“H:e:lll:o, I haa:vvv:eee a tt..aaa..bbb:llll:eee att:.ttt:hhh:rreee,” I chattered breathlessly said to the waiter at the door, looking around and recognizing some familiar faces, and some new ones at our table as well.

Once again, we discussed issues related to studying at Athabasca University, such as: tutor comments and complaints, examination locations and fees, programs and courses, study tips and schedules, previous educational experiences, aspects of the student union’s website (for example, message boards, student clubs/programs, student mentors, student council and student council elections), etc. Continuing from where we left off the last time, getting reacquainted with the people seemed easy for everyone. As well, the people that were new to the group fit in quickly. I could see that everyone seemed more cheerful as they drank their coffee.

This time we introduced some new topics into the discussion. “Did you know that there are benefits of being an Athabasca University student?”, asked one of the students. She explained how she found the student union (AUSU) to be helpful. “Yes, I found the ‘survival packs’ handy”, replied another student as she showed the rest of the group her new agenda and highlighter. “I found the articles in The Voice to be well written”, said another student. “I got my student card recently and used it for discounts,” yet another replied. “Oh and let’s not forget about our coffee group, that was set in place thanks to the union,” I quipped.

We also spoke about: assertiveness in dealing with tutors, marks/grades in coursework, information for income tax receipts, online versus individualized study courses, online versus in-person coffee group interactions, graduate students’ representation, and the resources and annoyances of studying in public libraries. “I can not believe we have so many things to talk about “, I thought.

AU topics aside, we also talked about non-academic topics such as: politics in the city, the high rental costs in Toronto, grocery shopping versus online grocery shopping, Toronto transit, equal rights in the workplace, and again, future possible coffee group field trips within Toronto and future meetings within our coffee group.

As I finished the last of my cup of coffee, I looked out the window. I could see the sky quickly darkening, as the sun set on the cold winter day. “I hope to see all of you again,” said one member as she got up to leave after our two hours were up. We all knew it was time to follow her and pay our coffee bills. Despite the cold weather, I was impressed at the turnout of the people for this meeting. After all, what better thing to warm the minds of the five AU students on a cold winter day than an informative warm cup of “Mocca Thingies”?

February 2004-March 2004

As much as I tried, I could not get everyone to meet in-person together. Some students wanted to meet on weekends, while other students wanted to meet during the week. Not knowing what to do, I decided to search the internet for an answer. At that point, I thought of perhaps having an online meeting in between our in-person meetings, for everyone in the group to still keep in contact with each other, despite scheduling differences. I hoped to have an online meeting. I realized that I missed a meeting for February, as I was continuously swamped with schoolwork (oh, that’s the life of being an AU student!). “Oh, I don’t know, maybe I’ll have an in-person meeting sometime later this month,” I thought. But then again, maybe I’ll just make a cup of “virtual coffee” for everyone ;).

February 2005

It has been a year since my last contact with the coffee group. Needless to say, due to the hectic schedule of being an AU student, I have decided to pass on the “Toronto Coffee Group coordination cup” to another AU student. Yet, I still continue to look forward to another day at a coffee shop somewhere in Toronto when I shall meet again in-person with other AU students.

Whenever I close my eyes, I can still smell the cup of coffee and think of such unforgettable wonderful memories I have shared with AU students. I have learned the lesson of the coffee cup, indeed: “Distance education is not such a lonely pursuit after all:”

My venture began a few weeks before the day of the “Doors Open Toronto”[2] event in May. On the overcast Saturday morning, I arrived at New City Hall. Inside of the building, there was a large group of people, eagerly wanting to help out on event day. As everyone picked up their volunteer information packages about our assigned locations, we waited to gather in the city council chamber for the presentation, which began shortly afterward with a short video highlighting the city of Toronto and ended with guest speakers highlighting the importance of helping out on the fifth anniversary of such an event . “Wow, I never knew the need to help out on an event such as this!” I thought.

Before I knew it, time had passed and it was the day of “Doors Open Toronto”. So, on a sunny spring Saturday in May, I was set to begin. Dressed in my blue and white volunteer shirt with my volunteer name tag hanging around my neck, I boarded the subway to my assigned location. On the way, I quickly re-read the information sheet about the location I was assigned to: “At 17 stories and 280 feet, it was the tallest building on University Avenue at the time”, I read from the list of facts, trying to remember as much as I could about the building.

Arriving early at the location, I decided to have a look around my assigned location. From the outside, I looked up to see the lighted weather beacon forecasting the clear weather of the day. Inside, I noticed the beautiful Roman columns and high ceilings that flanked the entranceway.

Seeing a short lineup for the elevator ride, I decided to take the elevator to the enclosed observation area on the top floor. Looking out the floor to ceiling windows seventeen stories above the city, I could see the CN Tower, with Lake Ontario in the background from one side, and the giant buildings towering over the downtown core of the city from another. On the ceiling of the observation area was a giant chandelier high above. Slowly, the sun began to shine through the clouds and a slight breeze blew through the open windows, creating the perfect viewing conditions for the day.

Heading back downstairs, I went to the area where there was a movie presentation about the building. People sat in the room with their eyes glued to the screen. Through a series of short clips, the movie depicted life during the early days of life in Toronto and told about the history of the building’s construction. In the same room, there were display areas where people could walk around and look at the artifacts taken from the original offices.

When it was time for my shift at the Canada Life Building in the afternoon, I stood in front of the giant mahogany doors behind the iron gates.

“Hello. Welcome. Straight ahead to the elevators; turn to the right for the movie presentation about the building,” I said politely to the crowds approaching the door. I stood in the doorway holding the door open for the visitors, from babies in carriages to seniors in walkers, from people who were familiar with Toronto, to foreign travellers. People of all ages, cultures and backgrounds came through the doors. It seemed as though everyone wanted to participate in the Doors Open experience!

“Can such an insignificant gesture as opening the door and greeting people make a difference in the city?” I wondered.

Just when I thought I was about to give up, more crowds continued to trickle through the doors, asking questions such as “When was this building built?”, “Where can I find more information about Doors Open?”, “What are some of the other Doors Open Toronto buildings located around here?”, “What can I do when I go inside the building?”, “Why is it called the Canada Life Assurance Company Building and not the Canada Life Insurance Company Building?”, “What do the different coloured lights on the weather indicator mean?”, etc., the visitors were eager to learn!

Suddenly, a limousine pulled up at the front door, and a huge crowd of people emerged. One by one, women in fancy dresses climbed out of the car, followed by men in tuxedos. A photographer climbed out last, draped with photography equipment, and proceeded to set up in front of the building. Posing for the camera, the bride, groom and the rest of the wedding party stood in front of the Canada Life building, using it as a scenic background for their wedding photos. Some of the passers-by asked what was going on, as there was quite a commotion out front. I told them about the Doors Open event and proceeded to guide the crowds past the wedding party and into the building. Despite the commotion in front of the building, the crowds were even more eager to tour the Canada Life building.

Before I knew it, the day was over as quickly as it began. Sadly, it was time to turn away people who wanted to enter the building. As the last group of people left, I was left in awe as to the impressive turnout of the amount of people who visited the Canada Life building today. “2000 people came to the building today,” I heard one of the other volunteers mention.

With the crowds gone, I took one last final elevator ride to the top of the building and had a “private tour” with the group of volunteers who were also working on the building that day. “Click.” With my camera I captured the memories of the day in this majestic landmark.

As I look back on that sunny day in May, I look at the photographs laid out on my desk and see magnificent scenes of Toronto. I close my eyes and imagine closing the giant mahogany doors on the travels of the day, hoping to re-open them again another year, with a “hello” at the door…

1 Cruz, Antonia. “Poetry Palette: Toronto Travels.” The Voice Magazine. 5 May 2004.
2 Doors Open Toronto. May 2004 – http://www.doorsopen.org

My venture began a few weeks before the day of the “Doors Open Toronto”[2] event in May. On the overcast Saturday morning, I arrived at New City Hall. Inside of the building, there was a large group of people, eagerly wanting to help out on event day. As everyone picked up their volunteer information packages about our assigned locations, we waited to gather in the city council chamber for the presentation, which began shortly afterward with a short video highlighting the city of Toronto and ended with guest speakers highlighting the importance of helping out on the fifth anniversary of such an event . “Wow, I never knew the need to help out on an event such as this!” I thought.

Before I knew it, time had passed and it was the day of “Doors Open Toronto”. So, on a sunny spring Saturday in May, I was set to begin. Dressed in my blue and white volunteer shirt with my volunteer name tag hanging around my neck, I boarded the subway to my assigned location. On the way, I quickly re-read the information sheet about the location I was assigned to: “At 17 stories and 280 feet, it was the tallest building on University Avenue at the time”, I read from the list of facts, trying to remember as much as I could about the building.

Arriving early at the location, I decided to have a look around my assigned location. From the outside, I looked up to see the lighted weather beacon forecasting the clear weather of the day. Inside, I noticed the beautiful Roman columns and high ceilings that flanked the entranceway.

Seeing a short lineup for the elevator ride, I decided to take the elevator to the enclosed observation area on the top floor. Looking out the floor to ceiling windows seventeen stories above the city, I could see the CN Tower, with Lake Ontario in the background from one side, and the giant buildings towering over the downtown core of the city from another. On the ceiling of the observation area was a giant chandelier high above. Slowly, the sun began to shine through the clouds and a slight breeze blew through the open windows, creating the perfect viewing conditions for the day.

Heading back downstairs, I went to the area where there was a movie presentation about the building. People sat in the room with their eyes glued to the screen. Through a series of short clips, the movie depicted life during the early days of life in Toronto and told about the history of the building’s construction. In the same room, there were display areas where people could walk around and look at the artifacts taken from the original offices.

When it was time for my shift at the Canada Life Building in the afternoon, I stood in front of the giant mahogany doors behind the iron gates.

“Hello. Welcome. Straight ahead to the elevators; turn to the right for the movie presentation about the building,” I said politely to the crowds approaching the door. I stood in the doorway holding the door open for the visitors, from babies in carriages to seniors in walkers, from people who were familiar with Toronto, to foreign travellers. People of all ages, cultures and backgrounds came through the doors. It seemed as though everyone wanted to participate in the Doors Open experience!

“Can such an insignificant gesture as opening the door and greeting people make a difference in the city?” I wondered.

Just when I thought I was about to give up, more crowds continued to trickle through the doors, asking questions such as “When was this building built?”, “Where can I find more information about Doors Open?”, “What are some of the other Doors Open Toronto buildings located around here?”, “What can I do when I go inside the building?”, “Why is it called the Canada Life Assurance Company Building and not the Canada Life Insurance Company Building?”, “What do the different coloured lights on the weather indicator mean?”, etc., the visitors were eager to learn!

Suddenly, a limousine pulled up at the front door, and a huge crowd of people emerged. One by one, women in fancy dresses climbed out of the car, followed by men in tuxedos. A photographer climbed out last, draped with photography equipment, and proceeded to set up in front of the building. Posing for the camera, the bride, groom and the rest of the wedding party stood in front of the Canada Life building, using it as a scenic background for their wedding photos. Some of the passers-by asked what was going on, as there was quite a commotion out front. I told them about the Doors Open event and proceeded to guide the crowds past the wedding party and into the building. Despite the commotion in front of the building, the crowds were even more eager to tour the Canada Life building.

Before I knew it, the day was over as quickly as it began. Sadly, it was time to turn away people who wanted to enter the building. As the last group of people left, I was left in awe as to the impressive turnout of the amount of people who visited the Canada Life building today. “2000 people came to the building today,” I heard one of the other volunteers mention.

With the crowds gone, I took one last final elevator ride to the top of the building and had a “private tour” with the group of volunteers who were also working on the building that day. “Click.” With my camera I captured the memories of the day in this majestic landmark.

As I look back on that sunny day in May, I look at the photographs laid out on my desk and see magnificent scenes of Toronto. I close my eyes and imagine closing the giant mahogany doors on the travels of the day, hoping to re-open them again another year, with a “hello” at the door…

1 Cruz, Antonia. “Poetry Palette: Toronto Travels.” The Voice Magazine. 5 May 2004.
2 Doors Open Toronto. May 2004 – http://www.doorsopen.org

“Hello, Toronto!” My Hometown

I begin my journey,
with a smile and a frown,
through the paved streets
of my hometown.

Where the doors are open
for a weekend each year,
during the spring season,
brightening up the town with plenty of joy and cheer.

Ole Toronto Town

I.
Roaming into the ROM,
where his-story is told.
That “all men may know his work” carved by his palm,
begin the chapter of dinosaurs who died from the cold.

The chapter continues, as I walk through the arches of time,
to where the stuffed animals hang by wire,
next to a cave where bats climb
and chomp on fruit flies at night to their heart’s desire.

Desiring nature’s beauty, man wants to follow,
travelling to Europe with his carving tool.
Gothic wooden statues of Mary and Jesus weeping in sorrow
he carves, mimicking nature like a joker’s fool.

Man does not easily give up his tasks.
He turns to woman instead,
adorning woman with Dior’s sequined dress, feathered mask,
and a pillbox hat placed upon her dainty head.

II.
Church bells chime for the women on a bright Sunday morning.
St. Michael’s, St. James, Metropolitan United
proclaim the choirs by singing,
“Everyone is welcomed, you are all invited!”

Incense, statues, altars, stained glass and crypts galore,
destroyed by the furnace’s heat.
While the church bricks burned with a fiery roar.
Churches rebuilt piece-by-piece, victorious against defeat.

Up the narrow staircase, where the ashes dwell
sits the Carillon practicing every weekend.
Ringing the city service by chiming the carillon bell,
in search of a signal from high above, hoping for a Godsend.

III.
Guided by the power of God, the Queen wanders into her park,
protected by the forefathers of the land.
Sir John A. Macdonald, William Lyon Mackenzie and George Brown guard the monarch.
Standing in stone, standing in sand.

Sand nurtures the red tulips in full bloom,
bleeding the battle scars of eighteen thirty-seven.
The troops marched up on Yonge Street to meet their doom,
wishing for a delayed trip to heaven.

IV.
Mackenzie marched his troops up Yonge Street,
past surveyor David Gibson’s house.
Where his eight children sat by the hearth, drying their wet feet,
while Mrs. Gibson spun her spinning wheel, quietly as a mouse.

V.
Spinning wheels morph into wagon wheels,
as the horses run towards the direction of the rising sun,
to where the horses hid in stables and waited for their daily meals,
preserving time at the historical society until century number twenty-one.

VI.
Decades have passed, and people still gather in the building of marble and lime,
where Big Ben chimed in the New Year
at Old City Hall, to plead the innocence of their crime,
faced by the murals of the early pioneer.

Upstairs in the courtroom where the judge follows lawful protocols,
the wooden courtroom doors sealed shut by the brass doorknobs,
as lawyers stare into the blank white canvas walls,
and innocent pleas are read, while witnesses sob.

Lennox did not cry, he did not give up his fight,
to make City Hall a spectacular sight to see.
He was the architect who stole the spotlight,
forging his name into the blueprints, smiling in joyful glee.

Even when he spent over two million dollars, Lennox did not look back.
He had the last laugh with the politician’s faces,
imprinting images of gargoyles for his counterattack,
carving his name into the exterior wall, invisible to the human eye in places.

Nouveau Toronto City

I.
A new eye watches over the city,
it is Nathan Phillip’s turn to show
how two tall buildings and a dome could make Toronto look pretty,
behind the eternal flame, lit by a fire’s glow.

Glowing inside the building is a wall of nails
made from copper and steel,
next to the hall from the photographs, where early settlers tell their tales,
across from the café where hungry library patrons enjoy a meal.

The Mayor eats upstairs in his glass office with a tank of aquarium fishes.
after lunch he sits in the busy council chamber hall,
answering questions from citizens, fulfilling neighborhood improvement wishes,
while citizens are waiting, as they gaze at the green tiled mosaic of Toronto on the wall.

The circular wall holds the funneled chamber base,
beside a small-scaled model of the city is put on display,
quilted by Toronto’s history, sewn by cotton and lace,
warming up the skaters on the square from a cold winter’s day.

II.
Today Eaton fills the bags of many shoppers,
whom the Canada geese guide.
Flying above the spouting fountain, leading to boutiques marked “his and hers”,
shoppers stock up on “Roots” sweaters, made from fleece.

III.
I walk past the busy gift shop customers, straight into the tower,
named for the Canadian National Railway,
where security guards puff air onto tourists, checking with their security power
and interactive screens show the tower’s construction from the builder’s workday

The action continues with the ride up to the tower’s top.
Flying up the elevator to the observation bases
as hearts pound and ears pop,
looking above the streets of Toronto to see people with tiny faces.

Staring at the tourist’s faces lying on the glass floors,
Lake Ontario, Centre Island, financial buildings fill the background,
and the cold spring air chills the deck of open corridors
next to the restaurant, revolving 360 degrees without making a sound.

Multicultural Toronto Mosaic

I.
My stomach growls, hungry with delight.
Hot dog stands I see at street corners.
Ketchup, mustard and relish I smother on my hot dog, to end my hunger plight,
while the hot dog vendor says hello to passing foreigners.

II.
Foreign tongues continue to speak,
as I walk down College Street
to Kensington market I go, to purchase groceries for the week.
A Portuguese shop I walk into, to find the finest cuts of meat.

Fine clothes, fruit and old furniture fill Kensington on my trip.
Bicycle riders travel around the market instead of riding the TTC rocket train,
as everyone else holds the rocket’s metal pole with a mighty grip,
knuckles become white in pain.

III.
With my painful calluses, I walk towards the eastern lands of China,
where loudspeakers blare out store sales
and ladies walk with fine silk gowns,
selling chopsticks, brush kits, Buddha statues and books of ancient tales.

Masked men walk to their homes,
fighting against the deadly SARS attack.
Protecting themselves from turning into bones
proclaiming, “Everyone careful, watch back!”

“Ciao, Toronto!” My City

I hang my backpack
with a notebook in tow.
Someday I shall come back,
for there are more story seeds to plant and grow.

Listening to the radio one evening, I could not help but notice a new song blasting though the airwaves. “The past can be undone, but we carry on our back the burdens time always reveals. In the lonely light of morning. In the wound that would not heal. It’s the bitter taste of losing everything I’ve held so dear:“. I heard the lyrics echo from the radio.

“What was the name of that song?” I thought as I continued to listen.

For the next couple of days, I walked down the street trying to figure out the artist who wrote and sang the lyrics to the song. Baffled, I walked down the street with the lyrics stuck in my head. In search of an answer, I went inside of a music store for assistance. Amidst a crowd of shoppers, I walked into the holiday-decorated store, only to hear the same lyrics over the music store’s loudspeakers.

“Could you please tell me the name of the song on the loudspeaker?” I asked the clerk behind the desk.

“Oh, that is Sarah McLachlan’s new album, Afterglow. We just received a new shipment this week. Would you like to purchase a copy?” he responded.

Surprised at the clerk’s response, I impulsively handed over $20. Was it worth my money? I asked myself as I walked out of the store with the album in my hand:

As soon as I arrived home, I started to regret my purchase. However, as soon as I placed the CD into my computer, I completely changed my mind when I heard the lyrics again.

Composed of ten brand new songs, Canadian singer Sarah McLachlan enchants the souls of listeners with her soulful lyrics on Afterglow. According to McLachlan, the meaning behind the title of her album is as follows: “When you look up Afterglow in the dictionary, it is defined as ‘the glow or light that remains once the sun is gone’. You’re used to this bright, shiny beautiful glow but the moment the sun disappears, all of a sudden you have to readjust everything. It’s a very transitional moment. A lot of these songs are about transition…the turning over of the rock, what’s underneath, the murky, shadowy uncertainty where everything looks very different” (2)

With the debut song “Fallen”, McLachlan sings a story about a woman who, after making a regretful decision, is desperate for divine intervention to help her “glow” again. In the following two verses of “Fallen”, the woman negatively questions her self worth in society, as she sees herself as “messed up” in her efforts to try to change the situation for the best. Being unable to live out the good intentions brought onto her by society, the woman feels as though she is only left with reminders about the scars from her past from the people who are the closest to her. In the final verse, even though the woman is left hopeless, she transforms to accept her loss in her relationships, while warning other women to be careful of the mistakes they have made in their lives.

“Time” tells the story of a woman’s journey toward “Afterglow”. She vividly personifies the passage of time passively haunting her life in comparison to “shadows moving across the wall”. Scared, she continues singing, feeling as though time is out to harm her. On the other hand, despite her failed attempts to stop time from harming her, she feels as though she needs more time in her life. Her love-hate relationship with time leaves her in a state of confusion, between wanting to keep time in her life in order to please the time controlling her life and wanting to keep time from controlling her life forever. Courageous with her inner battle against time, she finally transforms herself to forget about the harm time has done to her, by choosing instead not fight against it.

Contrasting on an optimistic note, is “Push”, which tells the story of a woman who has found her “Afterglow” in a person she genuinely trusts and believes in. Seeing the best and the worst of her, the other person keeps on appearing back in her life. The person she believes in has been emotionally “pushed” away by her many times during the worst times in her life. Yet despite her insensitivity, she relies on the other person to save her from drowning back into the dark depths of despair. Time and time again, the trustworthy person comes back, “offering her a softer place to land”. In the final verse, the woman is transformed when she leans that trust and forgiveness are needed in relationships, as shown through simple gestures, displays, care and concern, especially in times of need.

Closing my eyes, I stop for a moment now to reflect on this album. For the rest of the long hours of the night, I continue to let the other seven songs on the album play continuously in the background. I think again about the real reasons of why I purchased “Afterglow” that day. Was it because of the story behind the lyrics? Was it because of the sound of Sarah McLachlan’s voice? Was it because of the instrumental background music? Or was I simply a consumer of effective radio promotion? For whatever reason beyond my immediate comprehension, I slowly begin to understand what drew me into purchasing her album in the first place:

I would recommend Sarah McLachlan’s “Afterglow” to women, especially to women who are struggling to confront with past issues in their lives and who need a little bit of inspiration to turn their lives around in order to transform themselves for the better future they deserve. After all, perhaps this album can help women kick-start the transformation process to see the “Afterglow” at the end of the long and dark tunnel:

(1) McLachlan, Sarah. “Fallen.” Afterglow. Sony/ATV Songs, 2003.
(2) McLachlan, Sarah. Sarah McLachlan: Biography. 21 Nov. 2003. http://www.sarahmclachlan.com

“Unless you’re lucky, unless you’re healthy, fertile, unless you’re loved and fed, unless you’re clear about your direction, unless you’re offered what others are offered, you go down in darkness, down to despair” (p. 224).

Reta Winters finds herself in the unfortunate state of “unless”, when her oldest daughter (Norah) decides to live on the streets of Toronto at the tender age of nineteen. As a concerned mother, Reta retraces the path of Norah’s life through a series of flashbacks, while she continues her career in Orangetown by writing a bestseller (“My Thyme Is Up”), based on the events surrounding Norah’s disappearance.

Growing up, Norah is seen in Reta’s eyes as a well-behaved child, who had a lot of potential. Yet, Reta wonders why Norah would leave her family, friends and academic pursuits to lead a troubled life.

On the street corner of Bloor and Bathurst, Norah is found dressed in torn and ratted clothing simply holding a sign written in black magic marker on cardboard, with the word: “Goodness.” During the day, Norah begs for change, while at night she is taken in by a local shelter. Concerned family and friends also pray and make frequent trips to Norah’s street corner, hoping she will return back to her home soon.

Several months pass and Norah continues to live on the street during the long and cold winter months. Reta begins to give up hope of Norah ever returning home. Nevertheless, she deals with her loss of Norah by finishing her novel in time for publication.

Just when Reta is about to give up on Norah, events in “Unless” slowly take a turn for the better. Ironically, Reta and the rest of the family find Norah’s intentions for “Goodness” during one cold and winter night. The real reasons behind Norah’s disappearance are known, as Norah makes a healthy recovery from her illness.

Overall, Shields shows her best work in what appears to be her tenth and final book. In this heart-wrenching novel she conveys many words and emotions to readers, which effectively reveal a mother’s everlasting love for her daughter. For example, for the title of each chapter, she uses transitional words and phrases like “Here’s”, “Already” and “Not Yet”, to describe the chain of events surrounding the plot of the novel. In addition, by using the city of Toronto, a “darker side” of the city is revealed, making readers aware of an ongoing problem in dire need of attention.

Despite being more a fan of Carol Shields’ previous work, I would recommend “Unless” for everyone to read. In particular, I would especially like to recommend this book to mothers and daughters, who would benefit from a book dealing with this important life relationship. I give it four and a half bookmarks out of five. A truly fantastic literary work, indeed!

I looked out of my apartment window during the late afternoon. Cars were lined bumper to bumper driving north on Yonge Street. From a distance, I could hear the fire engines wailing. An ambulance was parked across the street in front of a building. Was it a traffic accident? Pedestrians scrambled back and forth aimlessly, jaywalking and ignoring all traffic signals. I looked down at the street again. There were no traffic signals! Doors were slamming in the apartment hallway. Beep. Hum. Beep. The smoke detectors shut down. The clock on my microwave flashed 0:00. I turned on my radio, only to hear the eerie sound of silence:

What was happening? Should I leave my apartment to investigate what was going on downstairs? Just then, the phone started to ring.

“He:ll:o,” I answered in a shaky voice.

“Hi, It’s Mom. I’m calling you from the payphone at the subway station. Did you know that the whole city has no electricity? There are no trains or busses. I’m stuck downtown and am about to walk home. I’ll wait for you downstairs when I arrive home,” answered the caller on the other end.

I hung up the phone. Panicked, I searched the cupboards for batteries and flashlights. With my flashlights in tow, I grabbed as many containers as I could to fill them up with water from the tap. As I turned on the tap, I noticed the water start to trickle in tiny droplets. Suddenly I remembered being told when I moved in that electricity was needed to pump the water onto the higher floors. Oh no! I was running out of water fast. For the next hour or so, I filled up as many containers as I could.

Before going downstairs, I phoned other relatives and neighbours, as I was concerned about their well-being. I walked down the hallway, until I came upon another neighbour down the hall.

“What are you doing here?” I asked.

I stared at him in disbelief. Here was a man trying to restart his laptop computer in the middle of the hallway. What an idiot! Note to self: Someone ought to write the “Idiot’s Guide to Power Outages.” You would think that at a critical moment like this a computer would be the least worry on someone’s mind. I wonder if he ever did get that computer started up during the power outage? I guess not.

Looking down at my watch, I knew I was running out of time before the sunset. With my flashlight in tow, I quickly ran down eighteen flights of stairs, in search of an elderly neighbour in another building whom I was concerned about. I was left in a state of awe by what appeared on the other side when I opened the emergency exit door: people of all shapes, sizes, ages, etc. were running around like mad chickens with their heads cut off across Yonge Street. Cyclists and rollerbladers criss-crossed the intersections as if they were on a racetrack course. Local business owners stood on guard for looters in their pitch-black stores.

Like everyone else, I jaywalked across the hectic street until I arrived at the front door of the neighbour’s apartment. When I made it to my neighbour’s building, I was greeted at the foot of stairs by a group of security personnel. I frantically explained my situation and was escorted up a darkened stairwell. When I made it to the top of the stairwell, my elderly neighbour was surprised to find me at the door. She was relieved when she saw me, as she had been waiting alone in the dark for hours.

“Make yourself at home. Sit down on the couch. Do you want to have a glass of juice? Just before you came, I lit a couple of candles my daughter had given me. I remember when:” she said politely.

I could not believe it! Here she was, pretending as though nothing had happened. For the next couple of hours, we joked around shared old stories under the dim candlelight, while I drank a glass of lukewarm juice.

By the time I knew it, it was as pitch-black on the outside as it was on the inside. With a feeling of dread, I headed back down onto the darkened Yonge Street. There was a long lineup in front of a sushi restaurant, as the chef prepared a meal near a propane stove. Sad to say, the smell of raw fish did not appeal to my hungry stomach, and I dreaded the long walk back upstairs.

The manager of the building greeted me in front of the concierge desk in the darkened lobby.

“You only have a couple of minutes left before the hallways are completely darkened,” he warned in his scruffy voice.

I quickly ran toward the open door of the dimly lit stairway. I was about halfway up the stairs, when I heard another “hum”. The lights in the stairwell flickered off and on, until it became totally darkened. I could hear the tune from the Titanic sing into my head. Was this what it was like for the survivors during that fateful night? Slowly, I fumbled around for a couple of minutes in search of the flashlight in my pocket. Thank goodness I had only another couple flights of stairs!

When I reached my apartment door, I stared at the glass door leading out to my balcony. I could not help but notice the beautiful night sky. Was this remarkable wonder of nature hidden under the bright city lights all the time? Tired and hot, I opened the balcony door and decided to spend the rest of the night “under the stars.”

“Hmmm:maybe the power outage isn’t so bad after all,” I thought to myself, as I turned my head upwards to witness this remarkable feat of nature.

Day 2 – August 15, 2003

Specks of light flicked off and on in my face. Awakened by the light, I cracked open an eyelid to find its source. I looked up: a group of youngsters from the apartment above were aiming their flashlights on the streets below. Too exhausted to care, I fell back asleep on the balcony chair.

Another speck of light hit my face. This time, it was the bright morning sun. My stomach started to growl when I woke up. Just then, the phone started the ring. On the other end of the line was a neighbour, inviting me to barbecue the remaining food from the fridge on the rooftop garden of our apartment building.

Without much thought, I grabbed a package of day-old chicken sausages and ran down the stairs in the dark with a bottle of water and a flashlight. When I reached the garden, I asked about my neighbour’s newborn baby. I was relieved when I heard that the baby was okay upstairs. Instead of staying for the barbecue, I gave the package of sausages to the neighbour and ran down the street in search of more water.

Walking down the stairs, I felt the stillness of the air. For the first time ever, the streets were deserted and barren, like a ghost town. Signs in black magic marker were posted on the windows of the local businesses. “Supermarket is closed, due to the power outage”, read the supermarket sign. “Closed until further notice. Sorry for the inconvenience,” read the sign on the bank. “Closed for obvious reasons. Appointments will be rescheduled,” read the sign on the on the local tattoo parlour.

Walking through the ghost town, I continued my search for water and batteries. I walked down the street in a desperate attempt to find anyone who would have a bottle of water. A darkened row of empty shelves greeted me as I passed by a variety store. Walking inside, a few boxes of crackers and canned food lay on the shelves.

“Do you have any water?” I asked the three ladies who were stationed at the checkout.

They shook their heads in the direction of the door, so I walked out of the store and back out into the ghost town. Further down the street I walked, until I arrived at another variety store. A crowd had gathered in front of the second store. I pushed my way through the crowd and ran toward the store’s freezer aisle. Pushing aside a box of slippers I slid open the freezer door to check for bottle of water. Finding none, I grabbed three bottles of Pepsi at the very bottom of the freezer and headed toward the back of the store in search of batteries. Eureka! I found a stack of batteries located in a small plastic bin near the back. Digging through the box with three other people, I found three packets of AA batteries, as the other three people continued to search for C batteries. I quickly headed to the front of the store again, to pay for my purchases. Another crowd had gathered at the man behind the cashier desk, demanding flashlights and candles, which were dwindling in supply. A rowdy teenager yelled at the cashier, demanding the price of pop should be lowered. Afraid of being in the centre of a dreadful confrontation, I grabbed my purchases and ran out the door.

I ran down the street in the direction of my apartment building, and went inside a third variety store, in search of water. Unfortunately, there were no bottles of water left. Sticky and tired, I gave up my search and walked back up the stairs. I was surprised to find a group of neighbours at the lobby of my apartment reading the newspaper. After chatting with a couple of neighbours, I followed one onto the second floor rooftop garden, before I had to make my long trek upstairs.

When I arrived at the garden, I emptied my Pepsi bottles and refilled them with water from the fountain in the exercise room. On my way back up the stairs, I met a woman who walked with me up the stairs with a candle.

“Those bags look heavy. Here, let me help you up the stairs with the light from my candle,” she said.

Guided by the light, I found my way back home. Was it a nightmare? Or a good dream? Sometimes it takes the worst situation to make find the best out of a person, or vice versa. After all, it is when we lose something that we realize we have taken for granted what we really have. Perhaps on that hot summer day, the city did not die. Rather, it was the day the city lived: