Dear Barb:
My daughter has two children and is in her twenties. She had her children when she was young and wasn’t able to finish school. Recently Sylvia began taking courses at AU as she finally realized she needs an education. She chose AU so she would be able to spend time with her children and do her studies in the evening, or when they are napping. The problem is Sylvia brings the kids over to my house most days and she says she has to study. I love my grandchildren, but I do have a life. My daughter and I have had a tumultuous relationship and I’m scared if I say something she will get angry and not bring the kids around at all. Not sure what to do?
Sue
Hi Sue:
I hope your daughter would not be that vindictive as to not let grandma see her grandchildren! You must be happy that your daughter has made the decision to return to school. That is a positive move for a young woman with her whole future ahead of her. AU is a good choice because of the flexibility. You do need to support your daughter during this transitional stage in her life, but as you say you do have a life. Perhaps you can sit down with your daughter and work out a schedule as to when you will watch the children, consequently giving her time to do her studies. Remind her that the advantage to AU is that she can do her school work in the evening or while the children are napping. Choose a day or two during the week that you agree to watch the children. Plan these days around your schedule. This will prevent your daughter from just showing up at your door and dropping the kids off when you may have other plans. Ultimately this could be advantageous for everyone, as you will get to spend precious time with your grandchildren and your daughter will have time to spend on her studies. Enjoy your grandchildren, as they will be teenagers before you know it!
Dear Barb:
I would just like to give you an update. I wrote to you January 10, 2014. At that time I was interested in dating my best friend’s sister but he wasn’t too keen on the idea. Well we took your advice and John, Melissa, Kara, and myself sat down together and talked things through. I know John was apprehensive at first about Kara and I dating, but now everything is fine. The four of us go out together and John and I have continued our close relationship. Kara just may be the love of my life. Thanks for your advice!
Pete
Hey there Pete, so happy to hear things worked out for you guys. Open, honest discussions are generally the best road to take.
Email your questions to voice@voicemagazine.org. Some submissions may be edited for length or to protect confidentiality; your real name and location will never be printed. This column is for entertainment only. The author is not a professional counsellor and this column is not intended to take the place of professional advice.
