Posts By: Erik Ditz

Erik Ditz

Milk-Crate Bandit – All Your Mainstream Are Belong To Us

In a lot of ways, the mainstream is representative of human evolution. It is never the same from year to year, is dependent on popular opinion, and involves a lot of skulls (I hate Avril Lavigne more than mere language can describe.) I equate Faith No More’s constant radio play with the human ear developing… Read more »

Milk-Crate Bandit – A Very Milk-Crate Christmas

Around this time of year, it always seems like winter’s gone on too long. The groundhog has done his job, It’s nearly St. Patrick’s Day, and we’re all pretty sick of Saint Freezing Rain and Old Man Road Slush. One thing that always makes cold weather more bearable is a slew of gifts, and I… Read more »

Milk-Crate Bandit – My Fate to Hate

In the future according to Star Trek, we’ll see loads of spandex, holograms, and things made out of dilithium. Michael J. Fox as Marty McFly depicts a world where hoverboards and dating your own mom are accessible commodities. My dream of days to come is a humbler one that plants its roots firmly in the… Read more »

Milk-Crate Bandit – The Basics of Music Time

I’d like to start with an apology for the somewhat misleading title of this article, which seems to suggest a lengthy pontification on the practical uses of time signatures. However, since time signatures were invented and patented by Ornette Coleman over a century ago, there is really very little left to be said on the… Read more »

Milk-Crate Bandit – Taking Care of Your Crested Gecko

New Caledonia’s crested gecko is one of the most versatile animals in the world. He not only has the ability to change his colour at will for camouflage, but a combination of a prehensile tail; feet adapted to running quietly along the forest floor as well as gripping branches and sticking to tree bark; night… Read more »

Milk-Crate Bandit – The Internet is Slowly Killing Everyone

Once upon a time, in ancient days gone by, there was no awesome beast called Internet. It was a pretty cool time full of barbarians and wizards and lots of Manowar. There were books instead of blogs, gramophones instead of MP3s, and duels instead of school bombings. People understood things and talked with each other… Read more »

The Milk-Crate Bandit – Please Ask Your Children to Leave the Room

No Country for Old Men Directed by: The Coen Brothers Starring: Woody Harrelson, Tommy Lee Jones, and an extremely scary man Beautiful location, great acting from a cast that couldn’t have been chosen better, brilliant dialogue, and loads of rootin? tootin? shoot-em-up barn-burnin? cowboy-style blood-and-guts action?but when the credits rolled, I felt like a kid… Read more »

The Milk-Crate Bandit – Underground Roundup

Aesop Rock ? None Shall Pass Constantly defying hip hop convention has worked for Aesop in the past, with underground hits like Fast Cars, Danger, Fire and Knives, and this album doesn’t see him settling down. Between brilliant wordplay, totally original samples and beats, a gorgeous digipack illustrated by Jeremy Fish, and an array of… Read more »

Milk-Crate Bandit – Treasure Hunt

Any experienced bargain hunter knows there are vast treasures beyond their wildest dreams stashed away in every pile of useless junk. Music is kind of like that; a big garage sale where there are a million old bent lamps and stuffed parrots for every copy of They Live! or Jesus Christ Superstar. Well, now it’s… Read more »